Christmas Dining

When I decorate for Christmas it looks like I lost a war with the holiday.  And I love it.

Behold: My dining room!

I'm in love, love, love with vintage Santas.  I love the look of cartoon Santas from the 40's and 50's.  I love the ones with sleek lines and geometric shapes.  Very round or very square or even triangle!

These Santas look great with my jadeite collection.  All that red and green!  Swoon!

I almost can't even handle it, I love it so much.

This is where Kermit On The Shelf lives.  He's way less creepy than that elf.  And he never tells on you.  To Santa or otherwise.  He just sits by the fire with a leggy blonde and enjoys the holidays.

Jadite Christmas.

This is my collection of tiny Christmas bits.  The cylinders are matchboxes.

Tiny cheese wedge A-frame house complete with mice!

This is my bathroom.  Yep.  Christmased it right up.  This shelf sits above the toilet.  I like to give the lads something interesting and festive to look at whilst they do their thing.

So, In Summary:

I win.

Living With Christmas

Why do I decorate for Christmas starting November 1st?  Because. I love it.  And I have a shit ton of decorations which take about two full weeks to put up.  (Two full weeks meaning the hours after dinner until bedtime.  I do have a job, people.)  And as I said before, I love Christmas.  These little bits of lights, glass, sparkle and shine keep me happy when the long winter sets in.  

I got news for you, Stark.  Winter isn't coming, it's already here.

So, if you are the kind of Grinch that hates Christmas music in November and cannot bear to see a decorated tree until after the turkey has been eaten, get out now.  This place will not make you happy.

To everyone else I say, welcome.  To my living room, in particular.

On my mantel each year, goes a little town of vintage and new trees and houses.  My main Christmas collection is Christmas trees.  And ceramics from the 1950's.  And Muppets ornaments.  And vintage Hallmark mouse ornaments.  

The first year we put the lights up there I could not bear to part with them and so we keep the lights up all year round. 

The snowy red truck is a new addition this year.  I got it at Target.  It reminds me of this scene from my favorite Muppet Christmas movie, Muppet Family Christmas:

Here we have an adorable Christmas Tree Stand.  With some vintage buddies.  The husband and I buy our tree from a local farm every year.  I like to support local agriculture.  Plus it's freaking adorable to go to a tree lot and choose your tree at night with all the lights strung up and a chill in the air.  Note that I said tree lot.  Not a tree farm, it's self.  I'm not trudging around seven soggy acres of trees in the freezing cold and chopping it down myself.  Those days are way over.  I'll leave that to the Griswold's.

I got these mittens at a thrift store, so don't get sentimental about them or which of my loved ones they once belonged to.  I just think they are perfectly adorable next to the tinsel tree.

Can we talk about Yankee Candles for a minute? Because I went in to get my yearly pine scented candle fix in time for the holiday season and...damn!  Those little suckers are worth their weight in gold!  I mean, this is some seriously expensive wax up in here!  Someone somewhere is making fortunes of fortunes out of this here wax.

That didn't stop me though.  I bought them all up.  Don't you judge me!

So, In Summary:

I need a little Christmas, right this very minute.

Ronald McDonald Sale 2013

It's for the kids.

If you keep repeating that mantra, you stop trying to judge if something is too expensive, if you really need it or if there is a fatal flaw in even considering owning an item.

It's for the kids.

And I mean, honestly, it really is.  It's a huge fundraiser and I participate in two ways:  I donate goods and then I go with a huge group of friends and buy other people's old goods.  For hours.  Sweaty, stressful,  adrenaline laced hours.  So many people do the same thing.  It's a beautiful thing.

Do you know what else is a beautiful things?  This here.

One dollar.  And quite a few fantasies.  Ah-hem.

Mooving right along to something a bit less...sultry. (Don't even pretend like I'm the only one.) 

From left to right: A vintage Scottie dog plush $3, which after purchase I found out has a squeaker in it.  Which makes me feel like it might be a vintage dog toy.  Apparently that's my thing now.  A tiny little bear dressed as a witch, because, you know.  50 cents.  And a DINOSAUR EARRING HOLDER.  Thassssright.  I'm gonna spray paint that dino cotton candy pank.  Not pink.  This here is gonna be paank.  I can feel your jealousy.  Don't give in to the Dark Side.  Unless it's the Dark Side of the Moon.  Because that's a great album.

Some lovely fall ceramics.  The piece on the left is a wall pocket.  A wall pocket is a vase that is flat on one side with a hole to hang it on the wall.  It has iridescent paint.  $2. Gorgeous. The creamer was 50 cents.  There is a tiny leaf on the other side, too.

This is a wooden Christmas tree candle holder.  $2. It has black glitter and was hand painted.  And this baby has a wingspan.  Probably like two and a half feet.  I plan to put it on the mantel.  

A stunning configuration of decorations that human go nuts over!  The vintage glitter bells were $1.50, the tree was $1, both of the Mary with baby Jesus icons were 50 cents together and vintage ornament...well, the vintage ornament is Hallmark.  From the 80's and super detailed.  One of those ones that you put a light in.  Can you tell I'm trying to pump it up?  So that you won't judge me when I tell you that I paid $8 for it.  A whopping $8.  It's for the kids.

Swiss cheese A-frame Christmas mouse house.  Oh yeah, I think so.  There is a rug, a Christmas tree, a mouse decorating the tree, a shelf with items on it, a stove, and a loft with a mouse sleeping in a bed.  Come on with this already.  I've told you before and I'll tell you again.  If I'm ever found murdered it was vintage Hallmark Christmas mouse ornaments that did it.

The only thing about this sale was that I didn't find any Muppet things.  At ALL.  Not even something I already have.  I'm not going to lie, it was a bit of a letdown.  Then at the restaurant we gather at after the sale my friend Heather threw this at me.  CAN YOU EVEN?

No. You can't.  I'm not altogether sure what little Kermit is supposed to be dressed as back there.  I'm leaning towards magician.  He's obviously oblivious to witchy Miss Piggy roofie-ing the punch.  Kiss Kissy Mix my ass.

So, In Summary:

Boba Named His Ship After Me (Yowza!)

Is Crazy Dog Toy Lady Worse Than Crazy Cat Lady?

Christmas Decorating Starts In 15 Short Days, Kids!

Put That Ham In The Slammer

Confessions Of A Creepy Collector

I love the Muppets.  

You know it.  It's no secret. That's not so creepy, right?  I mean, tons of people love the Muppets.

I collect Muppet (and Fraggle) items.  

Totally fine.  Lots of people collect things.  I mean, it's not like I have a fungus collection a la Gonzo. And the Muppets are super adorable, everyone had some Muppet toys as a kid and can probably relate to why they are so fun to find.  Right?

I have an entire room of said artifacts.

O.K.  That is a lot of Muppets.  But still, probably pretty cute and mayhaps a little impressive, even?? Creep factor starting to inch it's way up...

The Room of Muppets is in my basement.

...

Creep factor goes to 11.

But you know I can't help myself.  I am a born collector.  I love finding things, rescuing them from certain neglect, getting a good deal, data-basing them, ung.  I love the whole thing.  The entire chain of events.  

Tomorrow is the Ronald McDonald House fundraiser sale and it's starting two hours early this year.  TWO hours EARLY.  I'm trying to amp up my Muppet Grabbing Muscle by having a cathartic therapy session. And also I need to show you some really awesome Muppet stuff I recently found.

Item 1:

Fozzie Bear Latch Hook Rug $1.89.  Yes, that's right.  Less than two dollars.  Hold me.  This is the only latch hook rug I have.  There are so many Muppet ones!  I had a square green one when I was a kid.  It had Kermit's face on it.

And these guys.  Cute Halloween Muppets.

Confession:  These are dog toys.  I bought them at Petsmart.

Yes, I have a dog.  No, these are not for him.  He has his own toys.  THESE ARE MOMMY'S TOYS!!

They were $2 each.  They are Muppets dressed in Halloween garb.  Everyone is adorable, especially Kermit in his pumpkin outfit.  Gonzo is the weird one.  Obviously.  He's dressed as a pirate but that nose does NOT look right in 2D.

We also went to the Craft Antique Co-op where I found these delightful treasures.

A silver tinsel wreath, a silver star garland, a jadeite hankie with applique and a pair of silver feather earrings.

I spotted this lady and she was on sale!  It's a collage piece and I was just agog at it's beauty so I bought it right up.

Then I brought it home and showed the husband.  He said, "Oh, that's so cool...er...that looks like a dude.  I'm going to call that our Tony Kurtis picture."  Gurl, you better werk.

Last week we went pumpkin shopping.  One of the things that I love about this time of year is perusing rows of gorgeous pumpkins and gourds at the farmer's market.  Crisp fall air, the smell of leaves, choosing fry cakes to go with our apple cider.  Ah...fall.  Except this year it was 80 degrees.  Let me say that again.  EIGHTY DEGREES.  I don't love 80 degrees on a good day.  And I certainly don't want it to show up in the fall, while I'm picking out pumpkins.  

The sky was deadly overcast.  What I mean by that is it looked like The Nothing was rolling up on us.  Then it rained a lot.  But throughout, it was 80 degrees.  It was nasty hot and humid.  It was so hot I sweated through my bra.  See?  I told you.  Nasty hot.

I also got a new light for the pole out front which has been broken since about the second year we've lived here.  So like, seven years.  Then I painted the pole to match and repainted the numbers, too.  Check it.

I'm one of those sickos who loves a small home project.  Not a large one mind you, not something like remodeling the kitchen.  Oh, no.  Just a tiny thing, like picking out and hanging new shelves, or repainting a pole.  Small details make me happy.

I saw this next idea on Etsy.  I said, "I could make that!"  And then I did.  It's really that last part that is the clincher.  Because I have no end of "I could make that" moments.  It's the follow through that always gets me.  But this idea HAD to be done.  Just look at it!  

Primer:  Steal a bunch of vintage mask photos from the wide wide world of web.  Then print them out, cut them out (including eye holes) and string them up.  Two tiny hols per face works well for stringing.

So, In Summary:

Come Into My Basement, Children

What's Next, Cat Toys?

Lady Man Lady

You Should Make That

Tiny Treats

Heather and I embarked on what may very well be the last yard sale day of the year for us.  We were both lucky enough to find a bunch of things.  Some for presents, some to populate our Etsy stores and some treats for ourselves.

Let me show you my tiny treasures. Yep.  Muppets. (And a vintage Figment from Disney.  I used to go on that ride 20x in a row. I love me some Figment.)  Geeky Gonzo and Letterman Rowlf are from a set of 50's style Muppet teens.  I already have Poodle Skirt Piggy and Rock N Roll Animal.

Here they are all together. Missing from my set: Motorcycle Kermit and Soda Jerk Fozzy.  I was super stoked to get them for a quarter each!

So, In Summary:

Collect them All!

Falling 2013

I sit here writing this little post about fall and all it's glories in 90 degree weather.  90-duh-grees.  I don't know if I've ever told you what that does to me.  A really hot jag at the beginning of what I consider the holiday season.  Well folks, it's not pretty.  Generally it ends in tears.  Me, the Ice Queen, in tears.  It's an ugly reality.  And if it happens on my birthday, which is next week, just stand back.  There was one fateful year when my then boyfriend (now husband) made an ungodly amount of spaghetti dinner for all our friends on my birthday.  We had to go outside to eat it because it was too hot indoors.  It was the same wretched temperature outside.  At night, in the complete dark.  In the middle of September.  I ugly cried.  Generally I don't cry on account of the fact that I'm very logic oriented.  But, you can't reason away 90 degrees.  Especially if you don't have air conditioning.  Trust me, I've tried.

Quick, let's talk about something else.  How about fall decorations?  We'll pretend that it's 65 degrees and we are enjoying apple cider and fry cakes.  Mmm, delicious, right?

Let's look at my windowsill first.  Because all that stuff is new. And super cute.  Never mind that ghost girl in her pajamas.  Lilah got me the owl on the left and the sign.  The cute purple felt owl was crafted for me by my cousin Roxie who is super talented.

You've all seen this cupboard display a thousand times.  But here it is again.  In it's 2013 incarnation.  Bask in the autumnal joy.

Here's some up close bits.  So you can see all the black and orange detail.  The bat hanging on the left is new.  She's wearing a beaded necklace because she fancies herself a fashion icon.

Feeling brave?

I know, I have a lot of things coated in glitter.  I have three owls coated in glitter alone.   A crow, multiple pumpkins, not to mention a floral pic with giant glitter covered candy corn.  It's called pizzazz.

A box of shadows.

Piggy and Kermit approved.

Not a plague doctor mask.  Thank goodness.  Because that shit is terrifying.  Just a pretty but run-of-the-mill Italian long nose mask.

Birds of a glitter flock together.

She turned me into a newt!

And then...this happened.  I had a little spill-over.  So, the bedroom got a bit.  What can you do?

So, In Summary:

This Weather Bites

The Advent House Sale 2013

The Advent House is a pretty cool place.  It's a hospice house.  They only take two patients at a time and they get an entire suite to themselves.  It feels like a home and the people who work there are volunteers.  There are also rooms for family members to spend the night.  My grandmother spent some time there and I treasure the memories of her that I made there.  It's a great place but it, like so many other wonderful not-for-profits, needs our money to help it run.

Enter the Advent House Sale.  Each year they take donations of household items, toys, decor, electronics, etc. and then put on a huge sale.  The prices are great, the atmosphere friendly and the line to get it happily grows every year.  I take a day off for this sale.  It's serious business.

This year the sale was sadly a little smaller than years past.  I did still find a few presents for people and a few little treasures for myself.  

When you go into a sale like this you want to have a plan.  Where will you go first?  What is most important to you?  What do you want first dibs on?  Christmas/Hoiday?  Linens?  Jewelry?

This year my plan was Jewelry, toys, Christmas.  Jewelry was #1 because there isn't very much of it, but what there is, is pretty good.  Plus, last year I found like 5 Disney pins.  So, you know I'm going to scope that out.  Toys got the #2 spot because of my Etsy page.  I did find quite a few things, so I'm glad I went as quickly as I did.  And Christmas.  Because I love decorating for that holiday and just cannot get enough of it.

These are the things I found in jewelry.  No Disney pins this year.  The beads of the turquoise necklace are nice and heavy. The clasp is sterling silver.  It was $5 and I basically haven't taken it off since I bought it.  The bracelet is tooled and painted leather.  It was $1 and fits me so well.  It's adorable and I love it.  Since it's leather some part of me is distantly sad about it and since I'm a vegetarian I feel guilty that I don't feel really guilty about loving it.  You know?

Here are my itty bits.  You know I love a tiny cute thing.  I collect the tiny Strawberry Shortcake characters and this is my second one this year!  Woo!  I went like two years without finding any.  Yes, I do know that I could go online to Ebay or Etsy and just buy a whole bunch. But where is the fun in that, I ask you?  I'm a hunter, people.

I also found an entire sandwich baggie full of teesy tiny Hallmark ornaments.  Look at these suckers.  I mean, Hallmark.  You  know?  They are trying to kill me, I think.  Ever single thing they made from like 1979-1992 is more cute than the next.  Basically, I'm on the vintage Hallmark train and I'm riding it hard.  All the way to crazy town.

So, In Summary:

If You Find Yourself With Too Much Money, Donate To The Advent House

Vegetarians Wearing Meat Skin

If You Stand Between Me And A Display Of Vintage Hallmark, I Will Gouge Your Eyes Right Out

Saint Pius X!

The name of this church never ceases to conjure images of Kurt Wagner in his monk garb.  I think it's the "X" that really gets me.  I feel like you can't just say "Saint Pius the Tenth".  You have to yell "Saint Pius X!" like a battle cry.  This sale is really great and it actually does deserve a battle cry.

I get so much great stuff at this sale every single year.  Without fail.

The mask is hard plastic and was $1.  I've been fascinated with this type of mask since I saw (and then rewatched almost daily) Much Ado About Nothing.  That night party scene?  Yeah.  Obsession.  

On a sort of related note, I recently found out about plague doctor's masks and garb.  As if the freaking plague wasn't terrifying enough, we've got doctors trotting around in some sick steam punk-Miyazaki-Labyrinth nightmare.  Good god.  The plague would totally kill you, but on the off chance you were immune, the doctor would scare you to death.  That's a level 11 yipes.  I'm starting to creep myself out.  Quick!  Something cute!

The merry little Santa will chase away all the baddies.  He was a whole quarter.

The frame is a vintage souvenir from South Dakota.  I've been there!  Plus it has a native American and some pine cones.  Come on with that for a quarter.

I have a collection of cream colored pottery in my living room.  Mostly planters and vases.  What can I say?  All those Country Living magazines finally got to me.  This one was $1.  I was drawn to this one because of it's shape but then stayed because of the faces!  Almost creepy, but kind of Art Nouveau gorgeous.

So, In Summary

Don't Go To Sleep, Plague Doctors Will Eat You