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Wednesday, July 4, 2012

SoDak Episode II: Satan's Spire

I promise right now that reading this will be more fun, educational and all around a whole lot better than watching Star Wars Episode II.

On the way home from seeing the big heads we stopped at a maze.  This was Nick's idea and he was giddy at the thought of trying it out.  This wasn't a corn maze, it was made of thick wooden fence.  The kind you can't see through at all.  This, my friends was a real mother effing maze.  Like, the kind from Labyrinth.  I'm not at all convinced that it wasn't changing on us to keep us from reaching Baby Toby.  Four of us went in, one very smart member of our party sat out.  There were 4 towers and you had to find each and stamp your card with the tower stamp.  Then you had to find your way out.  Our friend Karl made it out in something like 26 minutes.  He was an Eagle Scout though.  I hear they have magical powers. The rest of us took over an hour to get out of there.  The husband and I were the only team and we took the longest amount of time at 1 hour and 20 minutes.  I'd like to state for the record that it was only because he didn't do as I said from the very beginning.  It's that way with most of the problems in the world.


Next we went to Satan's Spire.  Or, as it is known to most other people: Devils Tower.  Actually, the Native Americans called it Bear Lodge.  I'm just going to tell you right now that I've never seen Close Encounters.  I do know that you can't just walk up to the top of this rock.  It's a bazillion feet tall and straight up.  Just sitting out there in the pseudo dessert like a massive tree stump.


We saw people climbing it.  With lots of ropes.  Crazy, crazy people.  You can hike around the base of it.  One mile of paved pathway.  That gives you some scope as to how big this guy really is.


On our way home we stopped (as always) at the gift shop.  I love when places like that really know how to do kitch.  Observe.  These, you uncultured swine, are called Jackalopes.  If they weren't $80 I would have sent one to my friend.  She would have loved it.  For real.


So, in summary:
Star Wars Episodes 1-3 Are Abominations
Jareth Wins
Big Stump
Flashback to 1980's America's Funnies Home Videos

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